Archive for November, 2010

A Thanksgiving Post Full Of Thanks (to you!)

November 26, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! For the record, I’m posting this at 2:27 AM on Friday, November 26th, so I guess it’s no longer relevant for me to wish anyone a happy Thanksgiving. Honestly, I don’t care and most likely neither do you.

There are so many things to be thankful for. Sure, we often lose track of those things because we get so focused on the nagative (Lord knows this is commonplace for me). I guess it’s human nature to think about the things we don’t have rather than think about all the blessings. The simplest things get overlooked. Think about it. The fact that you’re breathing shows you’re alive and that’s something to be thankful for. If you’re reading this then it means that you’re literate. That’s pretty awesome. All the people who helped with that process are things you can be thankful for.

This leads me to the point of this rambling. Because all of you who have read this thing here, whether you only read once or you check back everyday (sorry I ave updated as feverishly as of late) I’m inspired to pursue my dreams of being a published writer. I think thanks are in order for that. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

Thank you.


Why Would Anyone Want To Be Famous: A Recluses View of Fame

November 22, 2010

After you factor out the money and the sex and all of those perks and being remembered, being famous kind of sucks.

I speak from the point of view of someone who has never been famous (or ever will be), but being famous just doesn’t seem to be very rewarding. Sure you get rewards, but don’t you lose the one thing most clear-headed people want, privacy and peace of mind? Ok, that was two things. But they both are true.

When you become famous, everyone knows pretty much everything about you (even if it’s incorrect). Which to me, doesn’t seem worth it. To think that something dumb you did in your past will be brought up and exposed on a national (or global) level kind of makes being rich and known not so great.

And think about the security you will need. If you’re famous someone will hate you. It doesn’t matter if you deserve it or not, someone will. And someone may want to do something with their hatred and act it out in a manner that is dangerous to you. So you’ll never get to go to the movies without your posse. You won’t be able to just go to an eatery you enjoy without some TMZ jerkoff asking you stupid questions. It’s just an awful way to live.

Ok. I’m lying. Being famous and rich really sounds great. I’m just a jaded unknown, moneyless, unattractive guy who is trying to downplay the greatness of being known. The famous really are lucky. And really are much better than the rest of us.

And The Winner of the Title for Person of the Year Goes To…

November 17, 2010

The BP oil spill! Check that, If I’m wrong I’ll gladly correct my blunder. I still don’t know how oil could be a person, but the world is a crazy place and I guess oil swamp people are everywhere noadays.

I think my favorite Time Person of the Year is when they selected me. I saw my face in the magazine and suddenly fel much more imortant than I ever have. Then cashier rang it up and I my debit card was denied.

What a bullshit “honor”.

An Uplifting Entry for A Change

November 16, 2010

How about we all just decide to be nice to one another for one day. Just one tiny day. Let’s turn the other cheek when someone wrongs you. Let someone else get the cab you hailed first. Lay down your coat for a lady so she won’t get her delightful toes wet. Toss back a football to some kids playing a game in a park.

Just be cool. Be considerate. Maybe we could start a trend. We’ll start with one day, and maybe that one day will turn into another day, and that day into another, and then another, and so on and so forth. And pretty soon maybe we’ll forget about boarders and they’ll be peace in the middle east. After all that’s what being a good guy is all about. The middle east peace procress. And on a lesser extent, getting laid. But if we’re speaking from my point of you, peace in the middle east sounds much more feasible.

No, Your Eyes Haven’t Gone Kooky

November 16, 2010

I’ve decided to switch up the look of my blog. I may change it back, but figured why not just do something different. Any feedback would be great. Afterall, I’m doing this thing for all of you. If ity’s an eye sore, let me know. Or vice-versa, if you just think it’s lovely, let me know too.

Anyway, here’s to a happy Tuesday.

These Posts Have Gradually Become More Depressing

November 16, 2010

And I think I know why: It’s colder. It’s darker. Things are more lonely (ok, that could just be a personal thing rather than something broad like the weather and daylight).

The worst part about this is the fact there is nothing you can do to rectify it. It just needs to run its course. Sure we get breaks in the sadness with things like Thanksgiving and Christmas, but then what? New Years Eve. Valentine’s day. Just awful, awful holidays meant to make lonely people feel worse about themselves and their loneliness.

So basically all there is to do is sleep and drink and get tattoos to feel like you’ve accomplished something. I’m getting a tiger eating a hamburger. What about you?

I Already Miss People/Places That Aren’t Gone Or I Haven’t Met Yet

November 11, 2010

I think there may be something wrong with me (something that if you’ve ever had a conversation with me you probably picked up on).

I’m not sure why I have a tendency to miss things before there is any reason to miss them, whether it be a person or place or job or whatever. I remember laying in bed with an ex (we were together at the time) and feeling like these moments were fleeting. It turns out they were, but they were only fleeting because I guess things have a tendency to end. I don’t know if my feelings of realizing the end was coming was anything other than stupid fear of something I held dear fading away, or if I just had an underlying sense that this was going to happen before it did. Or maybe, my fear of it ending could somehow be felt by my ex and she decided that she needed someone who wasn’t nearly as insecure and afraid of her leaving. Perhaps my legitimate (and now oddly proven) fear of her leaving was a turn off. Not because it showed how much I cared for her, but it showed how I depended on her for happiness. And maybe she couldn’t take that pressure. Or something about a guy loving a girl and realizing that she is all that he wanted frightened her.

Either way, I blame myself for it. Sure it’s an unfair reaction to the matter. You can’t tango with one person and what not and break ups are somehow the same way (even though they really aren’t. Two people can contribute but it’s fairly unusual to have two people equally end a relationship. That’s the truth despite what TV says).

Another example of this needless kind of thinking: I’m currently taking an EMT course where we are broken up into smaller groups and work together through the duration of the course. I have grown fond of my fellow group members and sincerely enjoy their company. While sitting in class a week or two ago I realized that after this course there is a decent probability that I will never see these people again.

That kind of thinking is pretty nonsensical when you consider the fact that we’ve exchanged phone numbers and no one is really that hard to get a hold of nowadays. But all those things require effort and maybe we won’t find it in us to make that effort. After all, people have a lot of things going on in their lives and meeting up with some people who used to be strangers and who have managed to become acquaintances might not be high on their list of priorities.

This kind of thinking really kind of sucks. I think I’m going to try to not think so much. Maybe take a holiday from my brain.

By means of a lobotomy of course. See you on the other side of the procedure.

Google Has Shown That People Are Really All The Same

November 11, 2010

This understanding came rather innocently enough. One night while researching how to craft the perfect blueberry pie I turned to my trusted search engine, Google. As I started typing in my question/topic of interest words sprouted up below the worlds I was typing in. Almost as they….already knew what I was going to say.

After getting over the fear that Google is simply everywhere in our lives (which it kind of is) I realized that these search suggestions came up because others had asked the same questions and wanted to retrieve information on the same topic that I wished to learn about.

After the feeling of how unoriginal I am, I felt a sense of relief that there are others out there who are wondering the same exact things as me. And after thinking about it more, I felt sad because the fact that people are searching for the random nonsense I look for kind of makes me wonder how much longer we have as a society. I mean, the fact that Google feels it is good business to help you along when you search for silly kittens we may be too far gone.

Of course, some would argue that Google is just trying to get some adorableness out to the public. Maybe some guy in Fargo North Dakota wanted to search for kitten torture and Google tried to steer him to the path of good.

Or maybe we as human beings are all so sickenly similar that it makes you wonder why we just can’t get along. I believe I wrote something that stated that opium would would help quell all this pointless anger we have.

But something tells me you don’t need opium to simply stop being a dick.

Maybe the Amish Have it Right (my lifetime of rumspringa)

November 10, 2010

When the world ends I’m pretty sure it will be brought on by technology. All these innovations we’ll ultimately lead to the demise we’ve all long  been awaiting.

We’ve certainly come a long way in a rather short time. A mere 100 yeas ago we could hardly tie our shoes (it’s in history books) and now we can find out virtually anything we want just by pushing a button. It used to take days to deliver a message to a person. Now it takes only seconds. Tasks that took hours now only take minutes. If we wanted to, we would never have to leave the house and we’d still get by fine.

All these things sound like a positive. Things are a whole lot simpler now, right?

No. They’re not. Things, if anything, are more complicated than they’ve ever been. Having information at our fingertips 24/7 is more detrimental to the human race than simply not knowing some things.

Take for instance the inventions of social networks such as Facebook and Myspace. Never before in history have we known more about complete strangers. Yet the inverse of that is that we’ve never been more disconnected from each other. While I may know everything going on in your life (who you’re dating/how the relationship is going, what schools you’ve attended and jobs you’ve worked, how you’re feeling after watching Glee, etc..) I still have no idea who you are. These little tid-bits that our casually thrown out into the world via the internet tell me about you without really telling me anything.

What I mean by that is that while we are continually allowing more of our lives leak into the public eye, we are leaving out the human aspect of it. In some ways, we are taking out the emotions involved in all these things. It’s as if we’re becoming cold and mechanical. Instead of going to someones home or calling someone or writing a letter (they still exist) we tap words on a tiny screen and hit send, or we sit in front of a box and push keys and convey emotions that no one will ever know if they are genuine or not. And we’re all ok with that. We’re ok with the lack of privacy. We gladly let the world know everything about ourselves even when the world doesn’t care at all. It makes us feel important. Makes us feel like we have a place in the world that matters and everyone else needs to know.

It’s sad. It’s sad and it’s addicting. It’s sad and it’s addicting and it’s so easy to get caught up in. Everyone is doing it and if you don’t make yourself do it as well there’s something wrong with you. In actuality, not getting caught up in it is the best thing you can do. Stay private. Really private. You’ll be happier. The saying goes ‘ignorance is bliss’ and that sentiment is painfully true.

By the way, I do realize the hypocrisy of me typing this on an online blog; spouting my opinions and trying to get people to come and see them. I constantly ask people to visit this thing and only because I want to see the number of visitors rise so I feel like I’ve accomplished something, when the truth is I’ve accomplished nothing*.

I’d write more, but I have to go update my Facebook status. The world needs to know what I think when it comes to Brett Farve’s penis.

*This is kind of a lie. I have accomplished something. I don’t know who else would so willingly admit to the world how big of an idiot he is. Really. Just read this blog and you’ll know.

Finding Meaning In Your Mistakes (how to live with no regrets)

November 5, 2010

We’ve all messed up. Probably pretty badly at one point or another. The good thing is that we’ve managed to move past these self inflicted setbacks and come out relatively unscathed on the other side; The bad is that we’ve lied to ourselves to get to that point.

It’s simple really. After we have made a mistake that has had an impact on our lives, we reason with ourselves. We say things like, this happened because this other thing wouldn’t have happened if the other thing didn’t. But that logic is flawed. You only say those things after something has happened that has in some way or another made your life better. Whether it be you getting a new job, finding another person to spend your time with and fuss over, or discovering that you love blue berries, you’ll say that these revelations wouldn’t be possible without your initial blunder. I say you just weren’t looking close enough at the world around you.

I don’t really have a problem with people thinking things are the way they are because everyone is on a path or whatever. I’m not even sure what I believe when it comes to fate and things of that nature. I do know, though, that I think that we should maybe just start admitting that we’re in situations we’re in because something happened and we can’t be where we once were. There’s nothing wrong with that. No shame. It’s just the truth.

You being a lousy lover didn’t allow you to find your soul mate. Time did. You messing up an account at work didn’t lead you to dicover your love of teaching. It just presented itself to you as a viable way to make money. You blowing your engine because you didn’t check the oil didn’t lead to you purchasing your dream car. Necessity did.

But we all say that it did lead us to where we are. And we make our mistakes go from being a bad thing into a necessary means to get you to where you needed to be. And that kind of makes our mistakes seem like they were worth making. Instead of just being a mistake, our mistakes become something we cherish. We justify everything and we fall asleep at night with a feeling of being one with the world. Because after all, even our mistakes are on our side and only there to make us become a better version of us.

I must really have a lot of faults.